The Billionaire's Suite Dreams Page 4

  ***

  Gabe looked up and studied her face when PJ entered the kitchen. She looked a bit like she might have been crying, but he didn’t want to push her with questions. He couldn’t imagine having his private thoughts spread out on the Internet for everyone to see. That had to hurt, even though she’d put up a pretty good front so far.

  “Dinner’s almost ready,” he said, tossing the freshly sliced tomatoes onto the top of the salad. “I thought we’d eat out on the patio?”

  PJ nodded at him but didn’t speak, and that’s when Gabe was sure—she had been crying. He came around the kitchen island and pulled her into him, tucking her head under his chin and rubbing her back. Not exactly the kind of contact he needed and wanted from Pru, but hell, she needed someone to help her right now. And damn, she felt so effing good in his arms—so perfectly right when he held her close. He could feel her small arms come around his back to hold him, and he really didn’t want to let her go.

  She pulled herself back first, and the disappointment he felt when she pulled away was tempered only slightly by the smile on her face when he looked down at her.

  “Thanks. I needed that,” she said.

  “Anytime,” he said. Any and every time you want.

  Gabe crossed to the island and grabbed the salad and plates. “The burgers should be ready out on the grill and everything else is already out there.”

  “It smells amazing,” she said as they walked to the patio together.

  Gabe set the salad down and went about plating the burgers and scooping heaps of mashed potatoes onto the plate. He looked down at the heaping plate then up at PJ’s tiny frame.

  “Oh, you probably can’t eat all this, can you?” he asked and turned to scoop some of the potatoes back. He’d served her the kind of portion he might hand to Jack or Andrew for a first round.

  PJ stabbed at his hand with a fork. “Back off my potatoes, mister,” she said and pulled the plate from his hands. “Mine,” she said, twisting to guard the food with her body as she eyed him suspiciously. He couldn’t help but laugh.

  “Something to drink?” Gabe’s face heated. With her history of alcohol addiction, he shouldn’t offer her anything alcoholic, he thought quickly. Why hadn’t he considered that earlier? He had no idea how his caretakers had stocked the fridge, and he hadn’t thought to ask for nonalcoholic drinks. “Water? Coke? Um––” He looked toward the small fridge in the outdoor kitchen, not sure what was there.

  “Water’s great,” PJ said as she sat at one of the chairs. She didn’t seem to notice his discomfort about what to offer her. Gabe grabbed two bottles of water and shut the fridge with his foot. He retrieved his plate from next to the grill and flicked a light switch with his elbow. Flames danced to life as he lowered himself into the chair next to PJ’s.

  PJ moaned again, her mouth filled with the bacon, blue cheese concoction he’d cooked up for them and Gabe felt his whole body still. If she didn’t knock off that adorable habit she had of moaning when something good crossed those lips, he wouldn't make it through the week without a lot of cold showers and hand lotion.

  “It’s okay if you want to drink,” she said in between bites, and Gabe’s first thoughts jumped to whiskey. Shots of whiskey might help him get through this alive and moderately sane without too many fantasies…about other ways he could make her moan, or what she might sound like when he took her soft nipple into his mouth and made it peak under his tongue.

  He shook his head instead, half in answer to her and half in an attempt to banish thoughts of PJ’s breasts from his mind. “I’m good with water. Burger okay?” he asked.

  “More than okay. It’s amazing. Maybe that’s what you should do now. Become a chef. Or open a chain of restaurants. World-class restaurants with nothing but comfort food.”

  Gabe laughed as PJ took another big bite and then followed that with a forkful of mashed potatoes.

  And, another moan. Dear Lord, woman. Gabe wanted to lean across his chair and swallow those moans of hers in a kiss. But, that was the last thing she needed and he wouldn’t do that to her now. He’d be what she needed: a friend.

  He shifted his plate in his lap. It wouldn’t look great for her to see exactly how much she affected him. She’d probably run and hide if she knew the kind of thoughts he had about her.

  “No?” she asked, seemingly unaware of the effect she had on him. “Don’t like the restaurant idea? Hmmm. A cooking show! I bet all the housewives would watch you cook. You know, jeans and an apron? Nothing much else?” PJ said with a mischievous grin. “I bet if you demonstrated how to make a bowl of cereal with no shirt on it would be a hit.”

  Gabe turned to look at her as she laughed next to him. Her whole face lit up when she laughed, and desire flew through him hard and fast and demanding.

  To hell with it.

  He leaned across the space between the two Adirondack chairs and swept her mouth with his, quickly. Just a taste. Just the taste he’d been dreaming about for years. He pulled back and looked into her stunned eyes.

  Shit.

  “I’m sorry,” he said, but didn’t move away as his eyes locked with hers. “I just wanted to see what that felt like. What you taste like.”

  PJ’s eyes were big and round and Gabe cursed again in his head. He really shouldn’t have done that. This wasn’t what she needed right now. He knew that. Hell, he’d been telling himself that for days whenever he tried to curb his desire.

  Then she stood up, and one of her hands snaked behind his head and pulled him up with her—back to her mouth—and he was lost. Utterly lost in the feel of her lips as they connected with his, the feel of her tongue as it tangled with his own, the feel of her body when he slid his arms around her and pulled her closer to him.

  Gabe allowed himself to get lost in her for just a moment, before pulling away and taking a breath.

  “Shit,” he said, not meeting her eyes.

  PJ was still and quiet next to him, and he could hear her trying to settle her breathing. It was likely as much of a challenge for her as it had been for him. That was one hell of a kiss.

  “Well,” PJ said with a little laugh. “That’s what you want to hear after you kiss a man. ‘Shit.’”

  Gabe’s eyes flew to hers and he ran a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry, PJ. I really didn’t mean to do that. I didn’t bring you here for that. I didn’t come here planning to take advantage of you like some...some... Shit.” Gabe didn’t know what else to say.

  He watched PJ’s face, trying to get a read on her thoughts, but she remained silent.

  “This is probably the last thing you need right now, Pru.” Something flickered behind her eyes and she sat up straight.

  “You know what? You’re right.” She nodded and gave him a tentative smile before setting her half-eaten meal next to his and pushing to her feet. The distraction might be nice, but getting involved right now wasn’t a good idea, no matter how strong the attraction between them ran. “I should get some sleep, I think. I’m pretty beat.”

  Gabe stood and nodded as she walked into the house, and he watched her turn toward her room. He didn’t know what he’d been thinking. They were barely a few hours into their trip and he had been all over her. Why on earth had he thought he could bring her here and keep his hands off her? Gabe tossed the leftover food in the trash and left the dishes in the sink. He’d deal with them in the morning. For now, he wanted to grab his swim trunks and hit the ocean. Maybe the cold water would knock some sense into him and cool his desire.

  Chapter Six

  PJ awoke slowly, blinking back the light that streamed in through the gauzy white curtains hanging over the patio doors. She tried to clear her head of the dream that had woken her. Her hand went to her mouth where she could almost feel Gabe’s mouth on hers as it had been in her dream. She could taste him. Feel him as he had gripped her tight and slanted his mouth over hers, tangling his tongue with hers, taking what he wanted. Giving her what she needed.

  Sh
e shook off the remnants of the dream and looked around the room as the events of the last forty-eight hours came back to her. Not the kiss with Gabe last night, but all the rest of it. The journal, the Kirt interview. She groaned and rolled over, pulling the covers up over her face. What she wouldn’t give to wind back the clock. Except for the kiss…

  She felt absolutely wrecked. Never mind the emotional toll of everything that had been happening. There was the fact she and Gabe had stayed up talking all Thursday night. She’d then had a short nap on the plane, but that was hardly enough to catch her up. Last night, she’d gone to bed early, only to toss and turn the whole night, imagining what Gabe Sawyer could have done with those hands and that mouth, that tongue, if he hadn’t put the brakes on that kiss.

  Oh, that kiss. Talk about melting her brain and setting her body on fire.

  But, Gabe was right. It was the last thing she needed. She cringed at the memory of him stopping the kiss. He’d barely touched her lips and the next thing she knew, she’d practically thrown herself at him, clinging to him.

  Ugh. PJ rolled over again and pulled the sheet off her head, staring out at the sun through the drapes. She was mortified at how she’d behaved. He probably thought she was completely trashy. He showed her the tiniest bit of compassion—of pity, really—and she took that and ran with it, making it into something entirely different.

  PJ hated to admit it, but she really was a complete idiot when it came to relationships with men. Her first relationship hadn’t even been a real relationship. In fact, it had been criminal. Statutory rape to be precise. Her career had taken off when she was barely fifteen years of age, and her manager was none other than the great Jimmy Mondo, who she’d thought had hung the moon. When he’d turned all his attention to her career—and, eventually, to her personally—she’d thought she was the luckiest girl on the planet. Jimmy Mondo loved her. He made her feel special, and she’d mistaken sex for love and intimacy.

  He’d given her wine to help her relax after shows, and she’d felt so grown up. No stealing beer or liquor from her parent’s liquor cabinet like other teenagers. Nope. She was practically an adult sleeping with one of the music industry’s most powerful players, sipping wine and laughing with him in her tour bus after her shows. At the time, she was too blinded to see how sick it was for a forty-year-old man to be sleeping with a fifteen-year-old girl.

  That was one reason PJ didn’t use a tour bus for her on-the-road accommodations any longer. Her band still did, and she sometimes traveled on it for short rides with them, but she stayed in hotels for her entire tour.

  It hadn’t taken long for her parents to find out about that ‘relationship’ and about her budding alcohol problem. In the span of only six months, he’d also gotten her started on smoking pot. She hadn’t graduated to anything stronger, thankfully, but she was certainly headed down the wrong path. And pot and alcohol weren’t the only things he’d gotten her. He’d gotten her pregnant, as well. Needless to say, that relationship ended poorly.

  Her parents got her out of the exclusive contract with Jimmy Mondo by threatening to turn him into the police if he didn’t let her walk away.

  When she’d made it back to her career ten months later, clean and sober and with her parents traveling with her for several years after that, she hadn’t had any interest in men. Her experience with Jimmy had left her jaded, and she didn’t exactly trust her judgment or the men she met in her industry. She’d had a few dates here and there when she was older, but honestly, she was stunted in the dating area. Frozen in that one area of her life after the experience with Jimmy.

  Nothing had really happened that bordered on serious, until Kirt. And, oh, what a disaster that had been. She’d been fooled once again into thinking he cared for her. She hadn’t been gullible enough to think it was love, yet. But, she’d sure been headed that way until she found out he wasn’t even remotely headed in the same direction.

  It had been mortifying when Gabe had stopped things from going any further last night, but she knew she should be grateful. She sure didn’t need anything like a man in her life right now. In fact, she wasn’t sure what she was doing in Connecticut at this time. She should be back with her team, trying to figure out who had her journal and what they’d do with it next.

  PJ’s phone beeped on the nightstand, and she looked at the screen with a sinking feeling in her stomach. She was almost afraid to have any connection to the outside world right now. She forced herself to look anyway, but not before she saw it was a text from Debra.

  You need to look at Twitter. We’re on top of it, trying to get it shut down and releasing a statement talking about balancing your need for privacy while giving your fans access to you, yada yada. Take a look and we’ll touch base with you later.

  PJ held her breath as she hit the small bird on her home screen and pulled up Twitter.

  Jimmy’s Little Whore filled her feed. Those words appeared over and over in what seemed like hundreds of tweets, complete with the hashtag #jimmyswhore. PJ clicked on the link in one of the tweets and was taken to a web page that showed several of her journal entries from her time with Jimmy Mondo. Everything from the first touches of his hands on her body to the day she lost her virginity. Complete with all of her ramblings about how special she’d been to him, how much he’d loved her. Of course, now, as an adult, she knew his reputation in the industry was despicable. It wouldn’t come as a huge surprise to anyone that she’d slept with him, although her young age at the time would probably shock them. And get him into deep trouble. She’d been fifteen. She couldn’t really blame them for calling her a whore.

  PJ scrolled to the bottom. There were hundreds of comments. Some supporting her, telling her how much they loved her, and how disgusting he’d been to take advantage of her. Others calling her a slut, saying she’d probably seduced him, speculating about how she’d made her name in the industry, how she’d gotten her big break. Still more wondered why Jimmy hadn’t been arrested, while others were angry that someone would steal her journal and release such private information.

  PJ wished she could say she didn’t feel ashamed and humiliated. But she did. She hated the idea that people knew what she’d done, how she’d spread her legs at the mere promise of love.

  She jumped at the sound of a knock on her door.

  “Pru? You awake?” came Gabe’s voice softly through the door.

  Gabe. PJ squeezed her eyes shut when she realized Gabe would be reading this stuff this morning, too. Gabe, her parents, Lydia and Ellis. Ugh.

  “Yeah, I’m up. I’ll, um. I’ll be out in a minute,” she said.

  “Okay. No rush. I’ve got some fruit cut up for breakfast and there’s cereal on the counter if you want it. Help yourself to anything. I’m going to head out to the beach for a run.”

  “Thank you,” PJ said, trying to hide the relief in her voice. Between his rejection last night and the things he’d probably read about her today, she wasn’t in any rush to face him.

  Her phone beeped and PJ glanced at the screen, afraid she’d see a blocked number again. Ellis showed as the Caller ID. She clicked on her messages in case Ellis was passing along important info from either Lydia or Debra, as he often did. As the lowest person in terms of seniority on the team of people closest to her, he often ended up playing the part of messenger and even gofer, when there wasn’t anyone else around.

  At times, PJ felt Lydia pushed him around a bit too much, and PJ had even talked to Lydia about it a time or two. Ellis was important to the team, whether Lydia wanted to view her brother that way or not. It was also well known among them all that Ellis had a pretty strong, albeit one-sided, crush on PJ. She was flattered and considered him a friend, but hadn’t ever had feelings for him beyond that.

  As she opened his messages, she almost regretted there was no spark between them. Ellis was faithful and supportive. He would probably never treat her the way Kirt had, and he certainly would never take advantage of someone so much younger than
him the way Jimmy had. Ellis was just, deep down, a really good person. Why couldn’t she be attracted to him?

  She frowned as images of Gabe filled her mind. His toned and tight body, his eyes as they bored into hers moments before his mouth captured hers…. She was attracted to Gabe Sawyer and she didn’t think he was a bad person. She knew he wasn’t the type of person to do what Jimmy did. As for what Kirt had done? Well, she wasn’t sure that Gabe wouldn’t do that. She’s seen enough pictures of him with models and celebrities on his arm to know he dated. A lot.

  She wasn’t sure Gabe would cheat the way Kirt had, but she also wasn’t sure he was what she needed right now. She simply couldn’t say why. Perhaps it was just the simple fact that she was so attracted to him that made him seem dangerous, in a way. She was so attracted to him her veneer of control was slipping away—he couldn't possibly be good for her.

  PJ read the string of messages from Ellis.

  Are you hanging in there?

  You’ve seen the news this morning, right?

  Try to ignore it... They’re just trying to mess with your head.

  She smiled, but there wasn’t much happiness in it. Of course Ellis would support her. He always did. But what did everyone else think? Even if they supported her now, would they still feel the same when they found out the rest of the story?

  Thanx, E. Just trying to rest right now and not pay attention to it until I have to:)

  Talk about Queen of Denial.

  PJ slid off the bed and went to the kitchen to get something to eat. She had just picked up an apple when a very angry, almost dangerous-looking Gabe stormed back in the house. His eyes were almost black as he glowered and held his phone out. It showed the website she’d just looked at moments before.

  “Is it true?” He all but growled the words at her and PJ clutched the edges of her robe together. She thought about giving him a vague answer that neither confirmed nor denied, but she knew Gabe wouldn't put up with that.